My experience with fibromyalgia…
It’s difficult to explain the pain that cannot be seen. However, it is quite easy to generate and one can see my reaction. The first symptom I ever experienced was sensitivity on my skin. Putting pants on, specifically yoga pants was the most painful experience, and I knew something was wrong. It felt like I was being skinned alive. That all the nerves in my body were on fire. The thought of being zapped when touched also came to mine. There were so many visuals that flooded my brain during my first experiences with this new pain I was having. Visuals help me explain it to doctors into those of my life.
People couldn’t quite understand still how one could feel these types of pain without actually inflicting pain or harm. A simple touch could feel like I was being hit or scratched or stabbed. Again, it’s completely impossible for someone to understand unless they’ve experienced it themselves, I often say I feel things 10 times more than the average person. But even that is hard to imagine. Stubbing a toe hurts for everyone but for me, it makes me drop to my knees or the pain refers up my entire leg and goes numb. Walking by some thing and getting too close to a table or a doorway and feeling it graze against my body causes pain, it’s not a oops, I guess I got too close and need to get out of the way.
Then there is the chronic fatigue and the body aches. Body aches that make you feel like you have the flu but you’re not sick. Much harder to diagnose after the pandemic so you end up taking Covid tests all the time to figure out if you’re actually sick or simply having a flareup. At the beginning, I was napping 2 to 3 hours a day if my schedule allowed. I was barely working out due to the chronic pain and trying to rehab my hip injury.
I didn’t know that reducing inflammation and increasing movement, we’re going to be the keys to reducing my symptoms and allowing me to live a relatively pain-free life. It took years of severe pain, stubbornness, injuries, and life’s up and downs to get to this point. Not everyone has the same symptoms either. When you look it up on the Internet, it seems like anyone could have this condition just based on the list of symptoms. Everyone has at least one. But it was a sensitivity to touch that really set it apart from everything else. And my clumsiness.
My mom always said how could I be clumsy if I’m a dancer? I don’t know, but I’m quite clumsy and for someone who can’t tolerate pain, clumsiness is not a good match. I constantly walk too close to the table and hit the corner on my leg or my toe, same thing with doorways. Anytime I carry a big box or a suitcase, somehow it rubs up against my leg and causes pain.
I prioritize, sleep, a low inflammatory diet, lots of water and lots of movement. Movement can be intense workouts or just a walk or just a stretch. I tailor everything to how I’m feeling day by day. The inflammation and bodyaches is almost worse because it takes the longest to go away and you don’t know what is causing it. Winter time I try and keep myself as warm as possible as my circulation in my hands and feet are poor and it reduces overall pain. Yesterday I had chronic pain in my right hand and forearm that lasted all day. I can’t even tell you why, today it’s my neck. Most people are attribute that to too much phone or computer or posture, but ultimately, I’m just very sensitive. Something that may bother someone at a one, will bother me at an eight or nine.
I share this only so others who struggle with chronic pain, with things that people cannot see. I believe them. Any of the symptoms that they have, I believe them. And I believe that they can heal, if not completely, they can certainly improve their quality of life. It is absolutely not easy. It is absolutely not a short term program. It is a lifelong dedication to wanting a better quality of life for yourself. I strongly urge people to not play victim and give up on themselves. I truly believe anything is possible with hard work and dedication and time.
